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Fuckers who send me 6 MB worth of 3 photos

Here at fuck fuckers we get a lot of submissions from the outside world. I really hate it when I get a batch of photos from an "interested user" in my email that hasn't been shrunk down.

We at fuck fuckers have a rule, the larger the pictures that we get in our email box, the smaller the penis of the person who sent them. If your pictures are each 1MB or larger, that means that your penis has shrunk smaller than the MOUSE (mimimum optimal upherass scale exponent) scale will record.

Please resize your images and don't show the rest of us your shame.

Thank you! Fuck you!

The staff at fuckfuckers.com

Karl's Anal Critters

After several years of public service, Karl Rove has finally begun his life-long dream. He has moved to Texas and opened Lubbock’s third largest person/animal sex emporium.

Karl’s Anal Critters sells both docile and aggressive sex critters at reasonable prices.  Their sign reads, “Karl’s Crits are better than Clits!” We were able to speak briefly with Rove about his newest venture:

Fuckers: Karl, you’re store is doing extremely well for being so new. How do you explain your success?

Rove: I may be new to the business, but I have dozens of years of experience with critter anal play. When you’re on the road as much as I am, it’s a necessity to have some sort of mammal with you to relieve your urges.

Fuckers: And what is your mammal of choice?

Rove: I personally prefer the over-sized gopher. You can fit it in a travel bag, but it’s asshole is generously proportioned. It’s a docile creature, and I prefer to stay in charge.

Fuckers: How does your family feel about your tendencies towards bestiality?

Rove: Whoa. Hold up. First of all, I don’t like the word bestiality it has a very negative context. At the White House we called it, Tex-Sex. And as far as my family, the ones that matter, they understand.

Fuckers: Do you plan on opening more Person/Animal sex emporiums throughout Texas?

Rove: I’d like to, and there’s a lot of money to be made in Texas on human/animal husbandry. Unfortunately, Texas also has its fair share of religious fanatics. They have a very short list of what animals humans should be able to have sex with. They also consider it cheating on your spouse when you participate in human/animal husbandry.

Fuckers: Have you ever impregnated a dog?

Rove: This interview is over.

Rove abruptly ended our interview over what he considered to be an inappropriate question. He later told Fuck Fuckers if we were more sensitive to his culture, we wouldn’t have asked such an insensitive question.

Steely Dan is a bitch

For focusing their attention primarily on each other during an orgy. After touring with Steely Dan for approximately 2 weeks, I was finally invited to participate in one of their world famous orgies. At Motel 6, 10 men and women including myself and the members of Steely Dan met and disrobed. To my surprise Walter Becker and Donald Fagen spent the entire night in the bathroom by themselves. To satisfy my curiosity I peeked in and saw Becker licking Fagen's asshole. Fagen's face was covered in cum, and the room smelt of old-man balls. Officials say this is common practice for Steely Dan. Fagan refused to comment on the situation. Becker, however, released the following statement:

“We were just experimenting. What do you want? Donald ate Mexican food last night plus there was no toilet paper.”

Welcome Bitches!

While I was druging around the internet the other day, I realized that a lot of people need a dirty dirty fucking. So I asked the owner of this site if I could write for it. He was a complete fuckchop and said "no. I only allow me and my gay friends to write. No hetero's allowed."

So i decided that in the spirit of the site, I would hack him and write anyway. So welcome to the site, and fuck you.

Nelson Mandela